Singing the Christmas Blues

Don't get me wrong, I was totally into Christmas this year. Just before Thanksgiving, I made the decision to try to make the majority of my gifts this year. I came up with some great (no, awesome) ideas and after I enjoyed my favorite holiday and the deliciousness that is turkey and sweet potatoes, I geared up for the amount of work that I would have to do in the next 30 days. I was one of those people listening to Christmas music the day after Thanksgiving. I braved the single digit temperatures to wait outside for the Black Friday sales. This year I was putting in 110% effort because Charley is at the age where she sort of gets it.

1st week of December went according to schedule. I purchased all of my materials for homemade gifts and started finalizing the details in my head.

2nd week of December we put up and decorated our tree! Oh, and I found out that I needed to have my wisdom teeth removed (before the end of the year!) So, I called and set up an appt. Of course, at this late notice, all they had available was the 21st or the 31st. Well, New Years Eve we're having guests, so that's a no. It'll have to be the 21st. No problem, I'll get everything done for Christmas before then and I can sit back and relax for the last week. (And watch the last minute panic of those who procrastinate. HAHAHAHA)

3rd week of December little miss got a flu bug and she laid around/rested for 2-3 days. This was the down time I needed to finish all the projects I had lined up. I ended up only making half of the needed gifts, but it's better than last year. As the week came to an end, I wrapped said gifts and readied myself for tooth extraction.

4th week is Christmas week! Still in the Christmas spirit, I check off the last of my to-do list and get ready to spend 3 days resting/recovering.

See, here is where my holiday spirit took a nose-dive. I came out of the surgical procedure and heard my husband say the phrase that I have heard all my life "Your teeth were a little difficult." Instead of healing in 36 hours like the lucky bastard that is my husband, I am now 2 1/2 days past extraction and still cannot feel my bottom lip, have excruciating pain in my jaw, and look like a Mack truck drove into my face.

I don't feel very Christmas-y right now. I'm debating whether I even want to spend Christmas with the 4 different sides of family.

I suppose if I could get some sleep, my Christmas spirit would eek a little higher on the radar, but as of right now, I want to punch anyone who says "Merry Christmas!"

The Promise of Girlie Things

For the 9 months of my pregnancy, I went without knowing the gender of this precious being that was growing inside of me. I wanted a girl, but thought it was boy the entire time. After months of anticipation, the day came to meet this little person who was going to bring us such joy. The doctor delivered that squirmy, alien-looking thing and passed it to the nurses. He never told me the gender so I had to ask "Is it a girl or boy?" He smiled at me and pronounced "It's a girl." I did a silent whoop for joy. I was already imagining all of the girlie things that were coming in the near future: ballet classes, curled hair, Barbies, and tea sets.

Fast forward 23 months...

This past weekend, my parents and I took Charley to the Walworth County Fair. I thought she would have a blast because she's almost 2 and I would let her go on a few rides. Well, I'm not really a rides person and never have been, so I forgot about the height restrictions. This limited our choices to 2. A car ride and a pony ride. When I saw the pony ride, I became giddy with excitement; it's every girls fantasy to have a pony or at least ride on one. So Grandma paid for Miss Charley to ride her first pony. I took her into the pen, placed her on the saddle, and showed her how to hang on. I was going to walk right next to her and I bet I had the stupidest grin on my face. As the horses started walking, there was a little fear in her eyes and she whined at me. "Caaa mama, Caaa" 'Car? Why is she saying car?' I talked to her and calmed her down. We kept riding around in circles and she relaxed enough to enjoy the rythm of the horses gait. But again, "Caaa mama, Caaaa" she whined. This time I couldn' t control the meltdown that was unfolding. "Caaa" she yelled. Thank heavens the ride was ending and I unhooked her from the saddle. I told myself "She's just too young, too afraid of big animals, not ready for this yet." But as we left the pen, "Caaa" was yelled again. Ok, Ok, even though I thought, maybe she's not ready for rides, I'll let her go on the car ride. Grandma put her in the car and stepped back. Zoom! The cars started to move and would you believe it. My girl was having the time of her life. She was waving and steering and laughing. She liked the car more than the pony!

I'll try to get her on a pony when she's a little older, but I'm bracing myself for the day I realize that my girl is a tomboy.

The Opposite of Stress...

Ahhhh, vacation is over. And I am so glad that this year was not a replica of the stressful trip of last year.

You see, this year I actually packed just the right amount, if not under-packed (I forgot a sweatshirt, but who would have thought I would need one in August? Oh wait... it's WISCONSIN!!!) And because I actually went into the vacation having extra room in the suitcase, I didn't have the stress of feeling like I was trying to squeeze an elephant into spandex when it came time to pack for the return trip.

The cabin we rent comes with a boat and this year, the owner upgraded to a pontoon boat. Stress-free fishing (once we got the battery issue fixed!) and no fighting over who gets to go out on the lake at what time. We all went together!

And last, but not least, no stress on the last day! This is the most important part of this vacation tale because if you ask anyone in my family, they will tell you how tense it was last year.

Let me paint you a picture of the year prior. On this last day, we need to pack up everything we brought (without forgetting that illusive sock!), load the vehicles (it's like a ginomous jigsaw puzzle!), and clean the cabin (vaccuum, dishes, etc). To get an early start in the hopes of leaving before noon, we all set the alarm clock for 8 am. Everyone except for my brother. My brother has the mentality that he can be ready in half-hour so he'll sleep until 11, throw some clothes on and be in the car waiting for us. Is this fair to those of us washing the plate from his midnight snack or vaccuuming up the sand he brought in? NO!!! He is 22 and in my opinion, perfectly capable of helping. So... I woke him up and told him so! Not a good idea for someone that is not a morning person. Man, was he grumpy! He picked fights with me, he picked fights with my mom, he was even surly with his almost 1 year-old niece! Charley couldn't talk, she didn't deserve that attitude. The air was thick with tension and nobody spoke for the last 20 minutes of the vacation.

That was last year...
Like a skier does a flip, this year was a complete 180. Total opposite!

We all packed most of our stuff the night before, we all were awake at reasonable times, and my brother even did the dishes because he knew he had the least amount to pack. I'd say there must have been some maturing done over the last year.

I was even able to handle a week of living with my mom.

Like I said... Stress-free! Which is how a vacation should be!

Final Countdown

Rustic cabin sitting
at the end of a long drive.
It's been a year,
too long!

I need this relaxation.
I need this week of family.

Baby is swimming,
Grill is sizzling.
Can't forget the mini golf.

Big fish waiting
for that worm on a hook.
Easy food,
be careful!

I need this serenity.
I need this environment.

Brother's snapping pictures,
Dog's are napping.
Trivia games all night.

Porch swing swaying
in the warm summer breeze.
Falling asleep,
nice nap.

I need the laughter.
I need the fun.

I love my knitting,
Jeff is reading.
Amazing week-long vacation.

Only one more day!

Baby Blue Eyes

I get how genetics work. Really, it's not hard to figure out that when you put together two sets of blue-eyed people and they have a child, chances are high that the child will have blue eyes as well. But when one parent has a lazy eye and the other has squinty eyes, what are the odds that you get a wide-eyed child?

At this point, I don't care how genetics work because my ladybug has...




the most amazing eyes!




Modeling hairbands for a little fashion show at home...


First airplane to Florida to visit Great-grandpa...

Enjoying the outdoors...

Stuck inside on a cold winter day here in Wisconsin!...

Going to the daycare for the day to visit Aunt Michelle and Nina...

Fourth of July family shot!

All of these photos depict an event that happened over the last year and a half, but all I see are baby blue eyes. I see this pair of eyes everyday: waking up in the morning, asking to watch The Princess and the Frog again please, snuggling with me on the couch, refusing dinner, and saying goodnight, but I am awestruck whenever I capture that sky blue color in a photo! Unbelievable!

Written as a part of Mama Kat's Writer's Workshop

Stress Treatment

We leave for vacation on Saturday morning! Time to start getting all of the cleaning and packing done. I need to start today so that I can PROCRASTINATE a little and still make sure I don't forget anything. I have my lists started, but I know I'll be adding more as the week progresses.

In anticipation for this week, I found a great stress reduction strategy and have it stuck to my refridgerator. It should help keep me sane! But it might cause a headache!

It's finally here!

It's finally August!!!

All summer long I have been anxiously waiting for August to get here. August is when I get to take my week-long vacation. I know, a lot of people would say "What do you need to take a vacation from?!" I stay home all day and I only have 1 child. Some people would call that a vacation. But in all honesty, I love going on our family vacation. It is 2 things that I absolutely love put together. What could be better? The family consists of my husband Jeff, little ladybug Charley, my parents, and my brother Andy and his girlfriend Lauren. And the vacation.... Well, that is the best part. It is a week of being away from the house! I get a week of fishing, sleeping in, 1/2 mom duty (Grandma loves taking care of Charley), 1/4 chef duty (we each prepare 2 meals), and almost no cleaning (just dishes). I'm out of my house, where I'm not staring at piles of laundry to be done or dishes to wash or beds to make. I'm almost obligation-free for an entire week.

Oh wait, I haven't mentioned the stress of the week-before-vacation. As every mom probably knows, that week before taking vacation is the worst week of the year! Ok, it's not as bad as Christmas preparations and the week of no-school that comes at the same time, but it's a close second in my book. I get through that week by making lists. Yes, I'm a list person. It helps me feel organized and prevents forgotten items. My husband doesn't like to make lists of what he might need so he tells me, "Don't let me forget to pack my ...!" As if I'm not already trying not to forget everything else. I make lists of to-do and to-pack. I have to make sure that enough laundry is done to pack for a week,then pack for Charley and I, have to get the dishes are done so they don't mold in the sink, make sure the fishing equipment is packed, get the dog's bed and bowls and food ready-to-go, remember to take the garbage out so the house doesn't stink, and somewhere in the back of my mind is that little voice that's telling me "I'm supposed to remind Jeff to pack something..."

What it is, I can't seem to remember at this moment! I should have put it on the list!

Oh, then there is the preparation for a 4 hour drive with an almost-2 year old! She doesn't like to sit in the car seat for even an hour so how am I going to keep her entertained? I make a list of toys and games and activities to lessen the amount of whining.

Well, up until this point, everything usually goes ok and I can finally relax and enjoy my vacation. Wait, I totally forgot, as I do every year, that after about 3 days I will be pulling my hair out because I can't deal with my mom for long periods of time. Don't get me wrong, I love my mom and am really grateful for the support system that I have in my family. But when it comes to letting her take care of Charley, she gets the "Grandma Syndrome". You know the symptoms, giving her candy when Mom says "No", letting her scream as she runs around the house, allowing naps to be wherever and whenever, sneaking her juice, and don't forget the late bedtimes. Basically, destroying all the hardwork that I've done for the last month trying to get her disiplined and on a schedule.

Vacation? What vacation? I'm usually ready to go home!

Painting Pride

I made a judgement call and decided not to leave the crayons out in the easel everyday. Charley was drawing on the walls. It was really cute because she would color and then go get the Magic Eraser to clean it up. But as cute as it was, I didn't want her coloring the entire playroom. So we took down the easel and put away the crayons for use only under supervision. But yesterday I decided to let her try a painting project. She doesn't like her fingers dirty so I didn't know how she would like it. She loved it. She used up all the paint I had given her and asked for more.

It held her attention for so long that I got the dishes done and still had time to teach her colors while she painted. Today, she saw her painting hanging up in the kitchen and I could tell...

she was proud of her artwork!

SummerTime Blues

Why is it that at the beginning of every summer I visualize spending everyday outside? I should know by now that I am not a fan of heat and humidity! I try to plan outdoor activities for Charley's sake. She could do something different and burn off energy if only I could get myself out the door. With my need for sunshine, I should enjoy heading outside for a few rays of golden sun. But, it never fails, as soon as I start to get sweaty and my hair starts to frizz, I run for the air conditioning. We live 2 blocks from the beach and we have a summer pass, but it feels like such a nuisance to pack up all the towels, sunscreen, and toys. Especially when we usually can only stay for 2 hours. I complain when it's cold and I complain when it's hot. Why can't it be spring and fall all the time? Then I would spend everyday outside! :)

Dr. Visits

Sickness has permeated our house!! About a month ago, my healthy baby girl got sick for the first time ever. She had croup and a high fever that lasted a week. I thought that with summer right around the corner, we would be in the clear for a while and not have to deal with disease. Not so lucky!! Last week, Charley started developing these red bumps that itched her like crazy. I thought they were just mosquito bites, but after a few days, they developed blisters on top. They weren't chicken pox and we still have no clue what they were. As for me, I am now the sick one. I think it's strep because it started with a sore throat. I had a slight fever for a few days and now it's just a lingering sore throat and swollen glands. Hopefully the weather will warm up just little so I can air out this germ-infested house.

Poor Babies!

This past weekend, my baby had croup. She was having major coughing fits that had a bark to it. And she was running a high fever all weekend. I kept giving her dose after dose of Tylenol to keep her cool, but as soon as it started to wear off, back up to 102. It even spiked to 104.3 on Saturday night. To top off this weekend of sickness, my furry baby threw up on my parents carpet. 2 sick babies!

If Jeff and I don't get sick from this croup, it'll be a miracle.

Special Days in the Eyes of a Woman

So, Happy Belated Mother's Day to all the mothers out there. This day is one of five days that mean anything to us as mothers and women. Listen up men out there! The 5 days that you need to mark on your calendar/blackberry/iPhone are (in chronological order):

• Valentine's Day (February 14th)
• Mother's Day (2nd Sunday in May)
• Sweetest Day (3rd Saturday in October)
• Christmas/ Kwanzaa/ Hanukkah
• your gal's birthday (whenever)

I know what most of you men are thinking right now. You're thinking, "But she told us not to celebrate/ buy gifts for that holiday." R..I..G..H..T! As women, we're supposed to be humble and modest and not beg for gifts. But, how do you think that those first 3 holidays got started? Women wanted days dedicated just to them. We wanted to be admired, appreciated, and doted on. And how do we make sure that happens? By creating a special day. I don't care how often or how seriously your lady friend has told you that she "doesn't want to celebrate" or "don't buy me anything". If you don't at least get her a card, you're going to be sleeping in the dog house licking your wounds.

As for my mother's day, I wasn't expecting much. My husband is not the type to go-all-out. He's the type that usually forgets or it just doesn't cross his mind, that I would like a little something that shows his love and admiration. I definitely did not marry him for his attention to details. However, I was surprised that he had helped my daughter make me a card. He also cooked a huge dinner for me and my parents. I did the dishes, but sometimes I can't give up enough control to let him take over everything. ;)

Busy, Busy...

I know that it's been awhile since I've posted last. It's been pretty hectic around here. My parents left on vacation last Friday and I had to work for my mom. So... Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday was spent working, house-sitting, and dog-sitting. I'm back home now, but still dog-sitting until they get home on Sunday. As if having an 18-month old and a dog of our own wasn't enough, now we have another dog to care for. It's definitely been crazy around here, but it has made me realize that our dog is very well behaved.

Even more important though, this past Tuesday marked a huge day in my sweet Charley's life. It was her first day at daycare. It was only for the one day, but I was definitely anxious about her reaction to being left all day with someone who wasn't me. She was with a babysitter on Monday and I think it helped with the separation on Tuesday. It was wonderful that she was able to be babysat by a friend of mine who Charley knows and who also works at the daycare. I think I was more tense about the situation than I needed to be, but I'm glad that it's over and she did fantastic!

I did realize though that I don't want to find a job. I like staying home with my princess and feel blessed to have that opportunity.

My Funny Honey Bunny

So... This is sort of a continuation of the last post because I just had to write about what little Miss Charley did today. She came around the corner from the bedrooms and I saw her trailing something. I thought it was a shirt or blanket, so I turned around to grab my cup of coffee and when I turned back... I realized it was toilet paper!!! She had grabbed the end of the roll from the bathroom and dragged it down the hall and into the living room. Luckily I caught her before she could run too far, but I still had to roll the stupid trail of TP back onto the roll.

Oh, the funny things children do.

Here are a few other moments.

This is her evil-eye glare. She tilts her head down and looks at you through the edge of her bangs. It's like she's trying to threaten you.

And this made me laugh all day long. I got her jammies off and was trying to get her dressed, when she took off running around the house and giggling. Then she put on my shoes and was walking around with this little ensemble on.

Even when she does something wrong, I can't stay mad.

Laughter is the best medicine. And there is plenty of it around here.

The Best Moments

I love being a stay-at-home mom! Charley does so many things during the day that just make my day. If I were working and she went to daycare every day, these things wouldn't happen or I wouldn't see them. To miss them would be a disappointment as they usually turn my mood around and brighten the rest of the day. Let me show you what I mean.

On this day, she decided to get into the drawer that has the winter accesories in it. She loved putting on MY hat and MY gloves.

She loves to help with the laundry and giggles non-stop when I bury her in the basket.

Sometimes, she thinks it's funny to cover her ears and hum when I'm talking to her.

Everyday, I laugh at something. It's never dull around this house and it's keeping me young. But mostly, it's keeping me alert and on my toes. :)

Sniffles and Itchy Eyes

The warmer air has affected the seasonal air molecules and my poor little girl is having a very hard time with allergies. It started yesterday morning with a runny nose and sniffles, but got worse in the afternoon with severely itchy eyes. She is so tired all the time. I can't believe she took a 3 hour nap yesterday. I feel so bad because there is nothing that I can do to fix it. I don't think there is any medication for children her age. She'll just have to be strong and sleep a lot to try to make it through the day. I'll ask her pediatrician if there is anything for her to take when she has her 18 month appointment later in April.

Spring is closer...

Well, the weather is getting warmer and I am starting to hear talk of gardening and planting. I was never one to play in the dirt and I have no idea about the timing for vegetables and flowers. Is it the right time to start tulips? How about green beans? When do you put pumpkin seeds in the ground? It seems like every flower and every vegetable has an optimal timeline and none of them is at the same time.

But, with the growing maternal/wife instincts going on inside of me, I feel the need to start a garden and a flower bed. I guess it is a sign of maturing and getting older. Now I must start researching every type of plant that I intend to grow. And this must be mixed with research of landscaping because I don't want to just throw some seeds at the soil and have them sprout up all over the place.

I must admit, this gardening thing is starting to sound intimidating. As if I don't have enough things on the list to get our house made-over, I feel the need to add the research of various flora and produce. Then there is the actual planting and don't forget the weeding and harvesting. Oh well! For the spring and summer, this looks to be my new, very time-consuming hobby. Oh wait, I have forgotten to mention all of the other hobbies that I have attempted over the last 5 years. I still like to pick them up every once and awhile, seeing as most of my "projects" are only half done. So if I think rationally, this gardening thing will be done after one season, if it even lasts that long. We'll see how my flowers and produce look after a few months.

Maybe I should just skip the frustration this is bound to bring...
I'll let you know what I decide.

Stupid Sleep

I failed today!! At everything I was planning to do...


1. I never made it to the gym this morning. I usually go at 6am, but today I decided to sleep in. Due to the fact that I was out until 2am on Wednesday night and got up early on Thursday morning, I was exhausted when my 5:55am alarm went off.


2. Sleeping in = not showering before Charley wakes up, therefore, I lounged in my pajamas all afternoon. My precious child does not allow me to shower while she is awake (she loves the bathtub! and wants to climb in too. With ALL her clothes on!). So, I have to wait until naptime, which is at 1pm. Gross! I know.


3. Because I didn't shower and sat in my pajamas all morning, I felt no motivation to do anything. No dishes, cleaning, laundry...Nothing!

Needless to say, I was finally ready to face the public at 4pm and the only thing I actually accomplished today was a trip to the grocery store. We were desperate for milk and I couldn't put it off another day! Now we've got company coming to visit and stay overnight tomorrow and I have a lot on my to-do list before they get here. Stress tomorrow? Oh yes!


All because I slept in.....
So not worth the extra 2 hours of sleep!

The Beginning

At this point in my life(almost 24 years old), I have many relationships and within them, many roles. I am a wife, mother, sister, daughter, in-law, friend, confidant, cook, lover, maid, chauffeur, poopy diaper changer, and last but not least dog owner.






Some of these roles are new to me. I've only been married for 2.5 years and only 18 months ago, I became a mom for the 1st time. Each relationship/role has the ability to change us and help us to develop ourselves further. Not one of these relationships is functional 100% of the time, but I try so hard to shape each role portrayal into something that is lasting and sustainable. I can only hope that the other perspective sees it the same way.

So... This marks the beginning; my transition from child to woman. And with my compulsion for it to be perfect, it will be adventurous.